08.07.17 - feedback on draft and methods to finish

Para 1. Good start but I suggest:
Modern historians who aim to present an accurate depiction of the past, struggle for historical objectivity because they are all influenced by their context.
Para 2 and 3. This works. Can you make a clear statement at the beginning that you are analysing the "Introduction".

Para 4 sentence 2. Can you say this more directly, I get the point. He is interested in the importance of sources which are usually neglected. (A similar thing happens in many "contact" histories when traditional historians neglect or don't value oreal traditions, a practice which denies non-literate indiginous people a voice.)

Para 5 You man "against" not "towards"

Para 6 "imitating" not "intimidating". You didn't say what you think about the interpretation. Is it imitation, revenge, belief or just disgusting?

Para 7 I love this point but it does need the supporting example - Ghost Dance - my vote is "yes".

Para 8 Good use of Bigfoot. Good point.

Para 9 "This narrative style is accompanied by endnotes..." I gather the point is that his methodological choices detract from his academic credibility - but then he was aiming for popular impact wasn't he. This can be shorter I think.

Para 10 and 11. Hollywood and the victim thing. Is good. You could shorten this into 1 para if you need to fit in Ghost Dance.

The rest. All solid. Try to make the point clearer that Brown's book works because of the effectiveness of the narrative and the perspective. It isn't academic so it works!

Overall this is just about done. It does need a little more work on both the Fetterman massacre and the Ghost Dance. Even more it needs proper punctuation! Check it and fix it. Nearly there Genevieve. Well done.

- mr wright

methods
1. apply feedback
2. edit references
3. include ghost dance paragraph
4. synopsis
5. evaluation